“Your dad has cancer that has spread all over his body…” was the text message that I received from my sister Keisha who heard the information from our Uncle Barney who has been more than a father than Bobby could dream of. I texted back, “That’s unfortunate.”
I didn’t talk about it anymore until 4 days later when Keisha sent another message from Uncle Barney letting me know that Bobby wanted to speak with me and shared the phone number to his hospital room in Florida. I contemplated … and then made a decision. I figured as a growing Christian and as a man with morals that I couldn’t let another human being die without honoring a simple request to hear my voice.
How did your father influence your life’s path? My father taught me that I could think for myself and solve problems if I tried. He expected me to achieve.
Fathers matter to their children. In fact, research says that father-child relationships influence children as much as mother-child relationships. Fathers influence their children in different ways than mothers. Babies who interact with their fathers tend to acquire language skills more readily. Children whose fathers spend time with them do better in school, have more self-control, and are more ambitious and willing to embrace risk. Teens who feel close to their fathers start having sex later.
Fathers are more involved with their children than ever before. The roles of mothers and fathers are converging. Most families with children have two incomes and share in the care of their children. And more fathers provide the primary care of their children.
The research says that African-American fathers are more likely to physically care for their children and prepare meals for them than other fathers. Most nonresident fathers maintain contact with their children, and many are involved with their children’s daily activities. Nonresident fathers who have jobs are more likely to be involved with their children. An equal number of moms and dads say that parenting is rewarding and central to their identity.
So what happens when a father is incarcerated? Emerging research finds that when fathers are sent to jail or prison, their children pay the price. And this is particularly true of sons. Sons of incarcerated fathers show more aggressive behavior and attention problems. Children of incarcerated fathers have more contact with the child welfare system.
That jaw-dropping number, 7.2 million more potential votes than Barack Obama carried in 2008 and almost 13 million more than Mitt Romney carried in 2012, is the least result achievable when you turn out THE MONSTER VOTE.
Remember, this same predictive model NAILED the turnout on both the GOP Primary side and the Democrat primary side. – SEE HERE–
What the New York Times is statistically beginning to quantify is the existence of The Monster Vote. If you look closely at the data behind their newly discovered 10 million potential/predictable voters, you’ll notice the additional votes carry to exactly what we predicted in February.
Even if Republican projection turnout was off by 5 million votes, Trump still wins in a landslide. Heck, even if the projection turnout was off by a staggering 10 million votes, the republican nominee (Trump) would still gets more votes than President Obama did in 2012 and it is highly doubtful Hillary could turn out that level of support. –link–
Few social policies seem to do as much universal good as paid paternity leave: Study after study has shown that when a father plays an active role in a child’s early years, he or she will end up healthier, achieve greater academic success, and even make more money. Everybody wins. Unfortunately, our country’s paid family …
Few social policies seem to do as much universal good as paid paternity leave: Study after study has shown that when a father plays an active role in a child’s early years, he or she will end up healthier, achieve greater academic success, and even make more money. Everybody wins. Unfortunately, our country’s paid family …
Which presidential candidate is best for dads?
Which presidential candidate is best for dads?
Politicians prefer to define problems in a way that makes them fixable, especially if “We the People” granted politicians more power. While they try to look busy with the easy, fixable problems, they ignore problems — perhaps the real problems — that are hard to solve.
Thus, they often seem more concerned with looking like they are fixing things so they can preserve their own position than actually taking on meaningful reform.
This dynamic is responsible for much of the population’s anger and frustration with the establishment that flows freely this election cycle, and fatherlessness is an exceptional example.
Yet the issue does not catch fire with Republicans even as fatherlessness grows.
Part of this is cultural. For example, societal norms have seen a rise in “unformed families,” and cohabitation arrangements are less stable than marital ones. Such cultural problems require cultural fixes, which require long term strategies outside of politics.
Should men become husbands and fathers—and many men today are choosing not to—they don’t stand a chance in a court of law if and when they get divorced. Family court judges are hopelessly biased against fathers. Of the two million restraining orders issued each year—85 percent against men—half don’t include any evidence of violence but rely on vague complaints made without proof or evidence. And once an order is issued, it becomes nearly impossible for a father to retain or regain custody or even get to see his own children. “Right under our noses, massive systemic injustice is being visited upon fathers, threatening the very fundamentals of family, society, and democracy,” writes Todd M. Aglialoro.
However, once a child’s parents split, in the unformed families and in divorce, fatherless often results from court decree. This family lawaspect of the problem has political solutions.
We the People might want solutions, but the establishment prefers the status quo.
Few social policies seem to do as much universal good as paid paternity leave: Study after study has shown that when a father plays an active role in a child’s early years, he or she will end up healthier, achieve greater academic success, and even make more money. Everybody wins. Unfortunately, our country’s paid family …
Children’s psychological reaction to divorce varies a great deal, according to Psychology Today. Their reactions depend on the nature of their relationship with each parent, the intensity and length of their parents’ divorce, how much they see each parent after the divorce and their personality.
Boys and girls suffer equally if their parents go through a lengthy and messy divorce, explains PsychPage.
However, boys act out their frustration and anger. Girls are more likely to internalize their emotions, which can result in depression, physical discomfort or changes in their eating and sleeping habits.
When parents divorce, it is important to maintain routine and stability in their children’s lives, explains Psychology Today.
It is all too common for children, especially adolescents, to become isolated from their divorced parents. Sometimes this isolation can take years to overcome. Children who continue to have a balanced relationship with both parents after a divorce typically cope better in the long run.
It is all too common for children, especially adolescents, to become isolated from their divorced parents. Sometimes this isolation can take years to overcome. Children who continue to have a balanced relationship with both parents after a divorce typically cope better in the long run.
Should men become husbands and fathers—and many men today are choosing not to—they don’t stand a chance in a court of law if and when they get divorced. Family court judges are hopelessly biased against fathers. Of the two million restraining orders issued each year—85 percent against men—half don’t include any evidence of violence but rely on vague complaints made without proof or evidence. And once an order is issued, it becomes nearly impossible for a father to retain or regain custody or even get to see his own children. “Right under our noses, massive systemic injustice is being visited upon fathers, threatening the very fundamentals of family, society, and democracy,” writes Todd M. Aglialoro.
I facilitated a 24/7 Dad® training for the Family Resource Center South Atlantic (FRCSA) last January in Raleigh, NC. When I returned a month later to deliver a second training on our InsideOut Dad® program, I was amazed at how proficient they had become facilitating 24/7 Dad® in only a few weeks!
“Develops in individuals assaulted by ethical violations, legal abuses, betrayals, and fraud” and that’s exacerbated by “abuse of power and authority and a profound lack of accountability in our courts.” ~ Karin P. Huffer
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Never doubt why so many are working so hard to #fixfamilycourts Every parent starts out equal but does not remain that way in the So-called family courts.
Once you enter that court you feel nothing but attacked. Your life and decisions are no longer your own. Your children are stripped from the life you thought you were protected to live. People in the family court process step in between you and your child regardless of whether you are for or not.
Some like Chris are left with no hope of ever recovering. What do you do when the court you thought would protect you and your child from vicious attacks on your fundamental rights fails you? Where do you turn when you cannot afford justice and when there is no hope for it?
Exactly two years ago today Chris Mackney took his own life after enduring the horrors of family court as long as he was able. The ex-wife (Dina Mackney) of Ch… See More
Bullied to Death: Chris Mackney’s Kafkaesque Divorce There is no one way or no best way to tell the story of a man driven by others to…Read More
There is no one way or no best way to tell the story of a man driven by others to take his life. I know, because I have been trying to explain to state leaders, media, and professionals how this is happening to good people who trust our legal system to work to protect them and their children. Challenging doesn’t even touch it. Author Mike Volpe…Read More
Where is the LOVE? …where on Earth.. ….not in Family Court or the hearts of those within the CPS, CYFS, SS. CAS or any other child…Read More
Gary Treistman explains how the Family Court System separated his daughter from him.
Owen Lucas films his open letter to the court admitting that he is in contempt of court for doing so.
He tells us of his grief and impotence in the face of the family court system.
Owen speaks for so many fathers who find themselves in the palm of ex-partners colluding with a system that in many cases, strips fathers of their homes, their children and their dignity – and often their jobs and financial stability too.
Mothers are given legal aid and fathers are not unless there is already proven child abuse.
In cases where abuse is suspected or even confirmed, a father has no clout to impact the family court system in many cases.
NB. If you know a child is being abused, ensure that a. you take photographs b. you film them speaking of the events and c. you inform the police without delay. These three steps may well be the difference between whether you become alienated from, or the main caregiver to your child/children.
The Cause “Stand Up For Zoraya” celebrates the love fathers have for their daughters, inspiring them to embrace the important role they hold in their daughters’ lives and to provide the love, nurture, and emotional support that only they can give. Every once in a while I feel like this blog was written by someone else, maybe a long lost friend,…Read More
Yesterday I gazed out the window watching fireworks and was really missing my angel but I cannot call her because I am scared of her mom’s false allegations and lies, she doesn’t call me and knowing she is…Read More
WLYB……I have tried to educate this board of 4 Florida Judges (Chief Judge Bertila Soto-11th Jud. Cir. FL, Judge Garber-3rd DCA FL,…Read More
I write about it because it’s too important not to. The subject is judicial bias in family courts. Now, we’re frequently told that there is no judicial bias on the part…
My opinion on the origin of mental illness is controversial to many in my profession. I maintain that emotional disturbances are…Read More
If You Seek a Bio-chemical Cause for Mental Health Disorders, You will become the “Little Train that Couldn’t” By Linda J. Gottlieb, LMFT, LCSW-r My opinion on the origin of mental illness is controversial to many in my profession. I maintain that emotional disturbances are situationally and not bio-chemically caused. But this position did not…
Letter sent to David Inguanzo on December 24th, 2008. October 5th, 2008 – After spending a “family” day out (Mom, Dad, my son David, and…Read More
Judge Valerie Manno Schurr appointed Mark Meland as a receiver for a company after finding it in “default” for failing to turn over financial records to South Florida power broker Chris Korge, who is represented by Kendall Coffey. Huh? Was the “default” a discovery sanction? Did the Judge strike the defendant’s pleadings? Is that what the…Read More
“Anyone who has ever worked in a legal aid office or law library has met people whose lives have come unhinged after a bad contact with the…Read More
This is the first post on this blog to introduce Legal AbuseSyndrome (LAS), a condition proposed by marriage and family therapist Karin P. Huffer, whose books on the subject of post-traumatic stress stemming from court-mediated violations are Overcoming the Devastation of Legal Abuse Syndrome (1995) and Legal Abuse Syndrome: 8 Steps for Avoiding…Read More
Across the country women, children, AND MEN are becoming the victims of judges and the court system. It is time that we take a stand, and…Read More
When someone hurts us and/or our children, our first reaction is to protect ourselves or to call the police. We think that as victims that the authorities should be there to help us; that as innocent victims the police, and court system should there for the best interest of the…Read More
The death of Christopher Mackney and his suicide note:
Problem 1: Children who lose contact with their fathers do worse in life.Problem 2:Single mothers who want to work often struggle with the cost of childcare.Problem 3: Many non-resident fathers are without meaningful work.
All three of these problems are fairly well established in the research literature. Each also motivates a battery of policy responses, with varying degrees of efficacy. In a recent report on poverty and opportunity from a working group convened by Brookings and the American Enterprise Institute, non-resident fathers received some special attention. (I was a member of the group).
The report notes that the Child Support Enforcement Program has become increasingly effective at establishing paternity and levying child support payments. Good: parenting is a responsibility, regardless of the nature of the relationship into which a child is born. But the payments can also be onerous for non-resident parents, who are almost always fathers, ‘functioning as a tax on their earnings’. The accumulation of child support debt is a particular problem – non-resident parents are currently about $53 billion in arrears for child support – and the Brookings/AEI group suggested that these kinds of debts should be forgiven in certain circumstances.
“Failing to expect both parents to support their children is not only unfair, it reduces marriage incentives, increases poverty rates for custodial mothers and children, and is likely to hurt children,” the report concludes. But we should not make the mistake of assuming that support can only come in the form of cash.
Since most non-resident parents are fathers, there is a tendency for policy-makers to see them primarily in terms of their financial obligations, as walking ATMs. Many of these men are in no position to make serious financial contributions: 41 percent of poor non-resident fathers have been out of paid work for at least a year, according to a recent study conducted by the Urban Institute. Meanwhile, working single mothers are also struggling. Forty percent of those working said that child care costs led them to change jobs or hours worked, according to a recent survey.
We’re just inviting you to take a timeout into the rhythmic ambiance of our breakfast, brunch and/or coffee selections. We are happy whenever you stop by.
I didn’t talk about it anymore until 4 days later when Keisha sent another message from Uncle Barney letting me know that Bobby wanted to speak with me and shared the phone number to his hospital room in Florida. I contemplated … and then made a decision. I figured as a growing Christian and as a man with morals that I couldn’t let another human being die without honoring a simple request to hear my voice.
However, boys act out their frustration and anger. Girls are more likely to internalize their emotions, which can result in depression, physical discomfort or changes in their eating and sleeping habits.
It is all too common for children, especially adolescents, to become isolated from their divorced parents. Sometimes this isolation can take years to overcome. Children who continue to have a balanced relationship with both parents after a divorce typically cope better in the long run.
It is all too common for children, especially adolescents, to become isolated from their 
Problem 3:
The report notes that the 
American Fathers 
