Fathering Is Patriotic

Few social policies seem to do as much universal good as paid paternity leave: Study after study has shown that when a father plays an active role in a child’s early years, he or she will end up healthier, achieve greater academic success, and even make more money. Everybody wins. Unfortunately, our country’s paid family …

Few social policies seem to do as much universal good as paid paternity leave: Study after study has shown that when a father plays an active role in a child’s early years, he or she will end up healthier, achieve greater academic success, and even make more money. Everybody wins. Unfortunately, our country’s paid family …

Celebrate the fact that you’re making a difference for your country.Securing Liberty - John Adams -- 2015

Fathering (journal)That’s right: Fathering Is Patriotic! As you’re faithful in your commitment to your children-investing yourself to raise them right-you are doing something courageous.

It’s like we’re on-the-ground troops in the fight for children. rtr30jroAnd when we all do our part in our own families and with other children who need us, we’ll help take care of many of society’s challenges-crime, healthcare, education, and much more-for future generations. honoring-soldiers-veterans-day-2-20110615If we really care about the future of our
country, we should be thinking about how to best nurture and protect our children.

As we prepare to celebrate the birth of our nation,
I have a couple of brief thoughts for your fathering: 

You want to see real fireworks?Independence Day - 2016

Just hang out with those kids for a while, especially when they haven’t all been together for a few months. Super Dads - 2015It’s always interesting and exciting. We hope you’ll get to celebrate with your children.

(And if you can’t be with them this weekend, find another time to relax, celebrate, and just enjoy each other.)

Second, do something to help your children appreciate their freedom as Americans.
You can talk about it with them and/or attend a patriotic event in your area.

Another great idea is to get them together with a war veteran or two.
If they think it’s hot where you are this weekend, their perspective might change if they heard stories from someone who served in Iraq, who carried 60 pounds of gear for hours in 135-degree heat, wearing long-sleeved shirts and long pants.

See this week’s full blog with action points.

How do you teach your children about the greatness of their country?

Please leave a comment on our Facebook page.

Root of Problem - 2016This Father’s Day, and every day, all across America, there are children who are being denied access to their fathers, and most of these fathers were in their children’s lives prior.

People must awaken to the truth and the horrors of family law and see how it’s the other parent and the family courts that have bankrupted and broken them down.

Changes must be made to these systems so the…Read More

Family law system broken, needs major changes ~ Bradenton Herald

State-By-State Analysis Highlights Parental Inequality Across The Nation

By Rita Fuerst Adams, National Executive Director, National Parents Organization

National Parents Organization just released its 2014 Shared Parenting Report Card. It is the first national study to provide a comprehensive ranking of the states on their child custody statutes, assessing them primarily on the degree to which they promote shared parenting after divorce or separation.

Here is the report and the executive summary:

“Despite what you might believe, shared parenting is not the norm in instances of divorce and separation. In fact, family courts award sole custody, usually to the mother, in over 80 percent of child custody cases,” said Ned Holstein, M.D., M.S., Founder and Chair, National Parents Organization. “Our report highlights that many states are not only discouraging shared parenting, but they are also depriving children of what they benefit from most — ample time with both of their parents — while also enabling a system that fosters parental inequality.”

This study was motivated by the tremendous impact our nation’s family courts have on children whose parents are divorced or separated, and also by recent consensus statements by leading child development research organizations that confirm children thrive with shared parenting following separation or divorce.

National Parents Organization 2014 Shared Parenting Report Card assigns each state a grade, A through F, to indicate the best and worst states for shared parenting — a flexible arrangement in which children enjoy the benefit of having both parents fully engaged in their lives after separation or divorce.cropped-every-child-deserves-a-mom-and-dad-2015.jpg“Our findings reveal that a majority of states’ statutory provisions are behind the times, with most earning C’s and D’s,” said Don Hubin, Ph.D., who led the National Parents Organization research team and is  Director for the Center for Ethics and Human Values at The Ohio State University.

“We hope that this study, coupled with research that demonstrates the many benefits of shared parenting, will encourage a new dialogue and will motivate our state legislatures and family courts to reexamine the impact they are having on our children.”

National Parents Organization’s research team has evaluated the child custody statutes of each state. In 45 states, the statutes address non-marital as well as marital children. In the remaining jurisdictions, we assessed only the statute pertaining to marital children. This is important to note because, according to recent U.S. Health and Human Services data, nearly 40% of children in our nation are born to unmarried parents.

As a result of our research, National Parents Organization found that a majority of states received poor grades on shared parenting statutes. This grade is reported for each state, together with the strengths and weaknesses of its child custody statutes. The national average is a 1.63 GPA (calculated on a 4.0 GPA scale).

Alaska and Arizona received the highest grades, but even they received only a B. The worst custody statutes were found in New York and Rhode Island. Our comprehensive review resulted in the following grades:

  • 0 states received an A
  • 8 states received a B
  • 18 states received a C
  • 23 states received a D
  • 2 states received an F

National Parents Organization’s research team looked at the complete language of each state’s child custody statutes. To arrive at a grade for each state, the research team utilized the following provisions.

  • Permission: Does the statute clearly permit shared parenting?
  • Policy: Does the statute include a policy encouraging shared parenting?
  • Preference: Does the statute express a preference for shared parenting? Does the custody statute recognize and reward a parent’s willingness and ability to facilitate and encourage a close and continuing relationship between the other parent and the child, which is known as the Friendly Parent Factor.
  • Presumption: Does the statute establish a rebuttable presumption of shared parenting even when parents do not agree? If so, is there a clear exception for cases of domestic abuse, which in the view of most experts, is important? And are judges required to justify deviations from the rebuttable presumption?

Conversely, does the statute presume a sole custody model, which works against gender equality and shared parenting?

Here is the report and the executive summary:

November 13, 2014

Dedicated to the proposition that children are best served by having unfettered EQUAL access to BOTH parents and to the proposition that fathers are indispensable. Remember that the overall goal is to raise happy, well adjusted children who have a…Read More

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Keep up the good work, Dads.

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8 thoughts on “Fathering Is Patriotic

  1. Our Constitutional right to bear arms is front and center in state and federal legislatures. But where is the debate on protecting our basic human rights to parent our children? (also constitutionally protected by the 14th amendment) Every day in every state, mothers and fathers lose their basic human right to parent their children.
    Why? Because the divorce industry wants your family’s money! Estimated at $170 Billion annually! How? We all have a family member, friend or neighbor who has been through a nasty divorce. Most of us believe children need both parents equally and that there exist a standard of 50/50 custody that the courts start from.
    NOT TRUE!!!! THERE IS NO PARENTING TIME STANDARD!!! THIS LACK OF STANDARD CREATES 90% OF ALL DIVORCE CONFLICT AND DIVORCE LITIGATION!!! IT DESTROYS FAMILIES AND LIVES!!! STOP IT NOW!!!!!
    In litigated divorce, there is no standard as to how children should spend their time between parents. The lack of a parenting time standard causes our children to be viewed as a prize where unethical lawyers and custody evaluators use them as pawns between parents. If there were a parenting time standard, it would resolve over half of divorce litigation taking place right now.
    MAKE PRESUMPTIVE 50/50 THE REBUTTABLE STANDARD AND ELIMINATE CUSTODY EVALUATIONS
    Start with the presumption that both parents are fit and entitled to an equal role in their children’s lives. This presumption is rebuttable only by findings of fact based upon a preponderance of evidence in abuse, neglect or addiction. Everything else unconstitutionally denies parents their rights to parent children.
    ONLY OUR LEGISLATORS CAN PROTECT US FROM THE DESTRUCTION OF DIVORCE WITHOUT OBJECTIVE AND EQUAL STANDARDS
    The divorce industry is $170B annually and motivated to oppose standards so they can create, promote and perpetuate conflict to increase billing hours exponentially. Have you ever heard “It’s only the lawyers who win in divorce”?
    Add to lawyers: custody evaluators (duplicate roles in some states), criminal lawyers, courts, psychologists, therapists, investigators, GALs, an entire cottage industry of brokers! With overdue and demanded, simple and just changes to state statues, families and children can be forever protected from the ravages of the divorce industry by a simple and equal standard. The lack of a presumptive 50/50 rebuttable standard destroys lives and families, often forever. Children as pawns can be scared for life, arbitrarily lose a parent, or two, for life and are in much greater peril in life. Mothers and fathers lose their children and react badly. Suicide and homicide is not uncommon. Mothers and fathers can be jailed for protecting their children or going bankrupt. http://www.causes.com/campaigns/44294-enact-uniform-parenting-time-guidelines-separated-parents

    Liked by 5 people

  2. Wave your flags over someone else’s head: my feelings about my country relative to those about my children are none of any movement’s business, and I won’t have the one conflated with the other, thank you. A sleazy election-year attention-grabber here, at best.

    Liked by 5 people

  3. It’s appropriate time to make a few plans for the future and it
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    Liked by 2 people

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